Time

I am sure we have all been told the phrase, "The older you get, the faster time seems to go by" or something along those lines. It's not that I ever doubted any of those people, I just simply thought that certain life events would happen at certain times. I don't think I was delusional. I just believed in the American Dream. You know the one from the 50s. Now, I didn't know it's origin when I was a little girl dreaming up my future, but the idea of a college degree, a job, a marriage, owning a house, and having children all by age 30 sounded GREAT to me. I was sold! Well now that I am 26 looking around at people I know who are around my age attaining these dreams, I wonder what did I do wrong. I want to know their secret to success. With my own reflections and a little research, I ventured through the blog world to see what was going on with other people similar to me. Sure enough there are people out there around my age that haven't achieved the American Dream, yet. I found huge comfort in that new knowledge. Then I was inspired to do a little more researching.
I read some things that I remembered from school, such as,
"After World War II, returning servicemen were given opportunities to put themselves through college, and many of them were the first in their families to earn a degree. Because of this, there was a huge difference in the growing post-war middle class, and its ability to own a house and to provide for their children. America emerged from World War II as the wealthiest and most powerful nation on the planet. There was an economic boom; jobs were available, and America was considered to be a land of opportunity." The first thing I thought about was the current job competition that exists. That competition simply was not a factor then because there were fewer college graduates.

My research yielded one thing that I hadn't ever realized.

After the war, most women returned home, let go from their jobs. Their jobs, again, belonged to men. However, there were lasting effects. Women had proven that they could do the job and within a few decades, women in the workforce became a common sight. An immediate effect is often overlooked. These women had saved much of their wages since there was little to buy during the war. It was this money that helped serve as a down payment for a new home and helped launch the prosperity of the 1950s.

While I knew that the war would have lasting influence on women working outside of the home, I did not realize that part about the saved money. Everything finally started to make sense. The American Dream of the 1950s was achieved under completely different circumstances than what I and other Americans live under. Does that mean I want to give up on that dream? No. I do, on the other hand, think that the time table needs to be altered. Time. That gets me back to my introduction. I read once that time can be a tyrant, ticking away relentlessly in your mind. We must learn to master time, or it will be your master.

I am finally realizing that I don't want time to be my master. If we don't have the best jobs or a house of our own or a baby before I am 30, that's actually OK! My life is uniquely mine. I like it that way (well most days when I stop overly comparing myself to others). I truly have enjoyed these first 2 years of marriage with my best friend. He makes me want to be a better person. He always knows how to make me smile. Some of my favorite memories from these past 2 years are the simple moments and the casual weekends. We love playing rock band together. We love watching our shows together. We love travelling together. He has supported me so much through my first two years of teaching. I have thoroughly enjoyed watching him grow as a coach and a man. I am so proud of him. I am also thankful that he reminds me to enjoy the simple things in life. He really does bring the fun into our relationship.

I have always been the planner. I guess that's why I have been stressing so much about our future. Where will we live? Where we will work? When will we have children? I love dreaming about our future together. If I could just stop right there, I wouldn't have this problem. BUT the dreaming turns into stressing because of my lack of patience. I am also working on trusting God and His timing for my life. I really DO believe God has a bigger plan for my life than I could ever imagine. And that is the promise that I have to rely on. I also want to be more appreciative of what I do have and gain strength from all that I have to be joyful about.

Time will continue to tick away. People will continue to dream. While I know I can't control when my dreams are realized, I can continue to work hard to achieve them. If in the process of growing and learning, I realize my dreams changing, then that's ok too. As long as I am listening to God, being proactive, and staying positive, good things will come. What I have to realize is that sometimes good things come in a very soft whisper.